Decrease Your Stress and Overwhelm by Changing Your Rules

Quite possibly my favourite re-breakthrough (word I made up meaning repeated breakthrough) of the year came this past week as I was forced to take time off after an unexpected emergency surgery. When the doctor told me I would need 2 weeks of complete & total rest (GASP! Not even a computer?!) from work, and 6 weeks before I could lift anything significant (bye bye super amazing workouts I LOVE) I was distraught. Learning that my appendix had exploded was the least of my worries because I thought:

  1. I HAVE TO WORK! I have to be there for my clients!
  2. I HAVE TO EXERCISE (in this specific way I like to exercise) to stay healthy and fit!
  3. I CANNOT JUST LAY IN BED for 2 weeks and go off the grid, I HAVE THINGS I HAVE TO DO!

relaxedIt turns out none of those things were true. The truth was that my clients were totally sympathetic and understanding, almost every one of them sending me flowers and a card. They also had no problem existing without access to me for 9 days, and are completely fine with us making up our time together at a later date. I’m sure you already figured this out, but I also didn’t die from not exercising for 10 days; I was actually allowed to walk and that was a nice experience. And, I really NEEDED to lay in bed and heal – not do a million things for work, friends & family, volunteering and around the house – and when I allowed myself to really shut off, I started to get better quickly. The point is, I was TOTALLY CONVINCED of those 3 things, and NOT ONE of them was true.

Bend the Rules a Little…

We all do this to ourselves, in our businesses and in our lives: we say that we HAVE to be at this meeting (that we booked/agreed to) or we HAVE to get this file done tonight (again, that we booked/agreed to) or we HAVE to do something we hate doing (which we may be able to delegate or just stop doing), and oftentimes these things aren’t true! I BEG you to look at your life and start challenging the rules you’ve made for yourself. A lot of them are causing you unnecessary stress and overwhelm. So change those rules! Next time you hear yourself start a sentence with “I have to…” ask yourself “REALLY? Do I REALLY have to?”

Less Stress, More Fun

One of my mentors has a grand old time while teaching me lessons like this one about life and business; she actually laughs as she illustrates what I’ve been doing wrong! I really admire her ability to keep things fun & light! She is showing me through that behavior that we can have serious conversations, psychological breakthroughs, and huge “aha moments” while having FUN! I never would have thought this possible before meeting her. Over the past ten years I’ve gotten used to her fun/laughing style, but I’m sure if you experienced it, at least at first, you’d think it was odd. This is another rule we should all break more often: have fun! Laugh! Enjoy your life as you do the things you need to do! She was, in fact, the mentor who delivered this great gift to me (while laughing of course): “Kelli-Rae, YOU made those rules! Nobody else did! YOU did! So change them!”

As always, I hope you learn from my imperfection and never ending journey of growth! Please reach out if you need assistance in implementing this in your life, and your business.

If you feel you need some help increasing your profits, contact TMH Business Coaching and Consulting today for a confidential, free, no obligation consultation to propel you forward. Also, please feel free to add yourself to our weekly coaching tips email!

Business can be better™ and it should be!

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Kelli-Rae Tamaki

Kelli-Rae is truly passionate about successful business, and believes it can always be better, which is why she has spent 22 years studying, running, coaching and consulting with businesses, just like yours.
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